Reclining in the darkness, trying to will myself to sleep while the blood in my legs dances a jig of nervousness around what may come tomorrow. I toss and turn, falling deep into a part of my mind where I don’t want to be while my eyes are closed. Every idea of who I am or who I should be comes creeping up the back of my skull, whispering sour nothings about all the what ifs and could have beens and I should be doing better. I clutch onto the pillow and try to run away to somewhere else in my mind, but the anxiety is chasing me as drowsy I dizzy myself into a statelessness of sleep.