The Guaranteed Cry

Gangsta Boo was getting on my nerves. I think he’s off his meds, off his rocker, on drugs and on one because, ooh, honey, this is getting intense. I was getting a little sick of all the abrupt and inconvenient golden showers texts, so I had to ask him to bring back some of the romance for a little bit. I know he’s in a weird place, but I haven’t seen him in almost two years, and, um, who starts off with golden showers? What does he expect is going to happen? I’m just going to show up at his door dressed like dog and let him greet me with a steady stream of piss first thing? If we start there, where do we end? Oh, he’s for sure going to maim me if we start with piss. Which normally is whatever to me, but I had to pull the “My dad just died, can we chill the fuck out for a second” card because, in all honesty, there’s some guaranteed crying that’s going to happen when I see Gangsta Boo again and I don’t want it to be while he’s beating me with that steel rod I have because then I’ll just seem like a weakling, and I am not a weakling! Gangsta Boo is probably the only person on this planet who would be really into the idea of fucking me while I cry and blubber about my dead dad. Out of all the crazy sexual things I’ve ever been into, “Can I talk about my dead dad with your dick inside me and then can you tell me how much you love me” is a pretty hard ask, even for people I love and trust, but, y’know what? I need it. I think it will be therapeutic for me, even if ultimately I’m going to wind up with piss down my throat and a gun to my head, or whatever it is he wants to do to me this time. Honestly, I haven’t cried about dad yet, so…gotta get these fucking tears out somehow. God, I hope he cries, too. Ugh, how gross is that, just two people fucking and boo hooing all over the place. Oh, fuck, I’m getting wet just thinking about it. That’s hot.

Am I really going to do this? Is this really happening? Eh, fuck it, isn’t this why you sick fucks read this blog? Gotta keep y’all coming back for more.

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